With the new year recently upon us, it is time to look ahead and begin preparing for what the promising year of 2018 has in store. If 2017 has taught the world anything, it is that sometimes the unexpected can happen, and here at The Quiver, we wish to give our readers some comfort by trying to predict what the biggest news stories will be in 2018 so that they can prepare for the worst. By using various techniques including, but not limited to, fortune tellers, Magic 8-balls and that octopus used to predict the outcomes of football matches (amongst other things), we wish to be at the forefront of news reporting. With that said, here are The Quiver’s top three predictions for the biggest news stories of 2018.
1. Discovery of Disney World Domination plans
According to our predictions, people will soon discover Disney’s secret plans hidden deep within the castle at Disneyland to dominate the world, a scandal that will be named “Disneygate.” Distracting people with superheroes and remakes, Disney will slowly follow through with their takeover by buying out Google and other large corporations. The scandal will prove to be damaging for the Walt Disney Corporation until the next Marvel movie comes out and everyone forgets about “Disneygate.”
2. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson will run for president in 2020
Similar to how he dominated the wrestling scene, The Rock will unveil plans to run for President in the year 2020. Going with the slogan, “The People’s Champ,” Johnson’s declaration will prove very popular amongst the population. With enough support, Johnson will promote the idea of changing the presidential election to a WWE style match between the incumbent and challenger, to which the Trump will most likely accept.
3. Trump and Kim Jong Un appear on “Dr. Phil”
To work out policies between the two countries, Trump and Kim Jong Un will appear on the hit show, “Dr. Phil,” where Dr. Phil will act as a moderator on the televised summit, making him relevant once again. The event will prove to be the watched by billions and lead to a reconciliation between the two leaders and the beginning of a new age of friendship between the two men as they decide to plan out their first night out.
Using our numerous resources we predict these to the biggest news stories of 2018 with little to absolutely no variations. While much of the world may be shocked, the readers of The Quiver will not be caught off guard. In that way, The Quiver is leading the world into a new age of media where we will not just be reporting current events, but also predicting future ones.